Reach Out

 

She reached out and grabbed for my hand.  It was an unusual move for my elderly mother; she thrives on her independence.  She had spent two and a half days in the hospital for a blockage in her colon.  The doctors and hospital staff had solved the issue, but she hadn’t eaten or moved for her two days of incarceration.  She was strong of mind and weak in body.  She must have felt very unsteady to have reached so quickly for my strength. We moved slowly to the car.  I was careful to match my pace to what I felt she was capable of handling.  Her steps were more shuffle than walking.  She knew where she was going, she knew how to get there, and she couldn’t get there on her own. 

We’ve all been there haven’t we?  We want to do things on our own.  Our culture encourages us to be individuals with independence.  We fiercely declare: I can do it!  We’ve been shouting our independence since we were toddlers.  And yet all of us have those seasons when we need to count on the strength of others. 

Ecclesiastes 4:9 & 10 says “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts.  For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up.”  (CSB) Paul in Acts 20:35 challenges us “…to help the weak…” (CSB) Hebrews 10:24 says, “Let us watch out for one another to provoke love and good works.” (CSB) Romans 15:1-4 talks about strengthening others when their faith is not as mature as our own.  As believers, I think we are so aware that we are to be strong for others, we forget to acknowledge our moments when we need others to step in and steady us. We struggle to admit we need to grasp someone else’s hand so we can take the necessary steps forward.  

I’ve been learning practical lessons about leaning on others as I’ve made myself available for my mom to lean on me.  The first lesson is to ask for help.  It’s okay to say you can’t do it all.  God doesn’t expect us to do everything; we are the body of Christ and not the individuals of Jesus (Romans 12:4 & 5). Second, don’t make everything all about you.  It’s easy when circumstances are hard to fall into the pattern of complaining and focusing only on what we are experiencing.  Sadly, this clouds our perspective and positions us to be unaware when someone reaches out to steady us (James 1:2-4). Third, open your eyes to how you can still meet the need of someone else. Often, those we reach out to for help are also struggling with something.  Remember we are Christ’s body, working together, supporting one another for the purposes of God.  There is comfort and power in knowing you are standing in strength together (Philippians 2:1-4).

Galatians 6:2 tells us we are to carry one another’s burden.  Sometimes we help someone carry their load; sometimes we are the one who is weighed down.  It doesn’t make any difference; we are to be in it together.  We were not created to journey alone.  God is gracious to bless us when we serve, and when we are the one being served.  Reach out your hand. 

Disciple over Discipline

 

For years I labeled myself undisciplined.  I couldn’t seem to exercise with any consistency at all.  My diet was whatever food was convenient.  My house appeared clean, but it really was a well-played illusion.  I’m ashamed to admit I’m bad about changing my sheets every week, and washing my face every night.  For the majority of my 50 some odd years, having a regular quiet time was hit and miss with a distinct lean toward a miss.  I figured it was the bane of my existence, being undisciplined.  I concluded that being disciplined was out of my wheelhouse.

I put on a happy face about my limitation.  I laughed it off, or mentioned that I was “more creative” or “I thrive on being fun!” They are true statements and they covered up what I perceived to be a major point of failure in my life.  After all, successful people, people who are winners, are disciplined.  Right?  I beat myself up, and figured God could never use me in a powerful way.  I spoke lies to myself.  I called myself a bad Christian.  I put silent pressure on myself to match up to some standard that was written nowhere but in my own mind. 

I’m often intrigued by the fact that the word disciple is hidden in the word discipline.  To me, the word disciple speaks of learning and growing, of failing and relearning, of discovering new ideas and erasing old concepts.  It doesn’t scare me like the word discipline.  So I’ve learned to change my perspective.  I’m a disciple and I’m learning.  I’m learning of my desperate need for Jesus.  I’m learning that when I focus on listening to His voice, I become more aware of how He is moving in my life.  I’m learning to give myself grace when life interferes with what I think is the ideal. I’m learning to not be concerned about checking items off a spiritual to-do list, but to engage in a journey with the One who created me and loves me more than I can fathom.

I am continually learning the truth of Proverbs 4:21 and 22.  “Fill your thoughts with my words until they penetrate deep within your spirit.  They will impart true life and radiant health into the very core of your being.” (The Passion Translation) Throughout my journey I’ve learned a variety of ways to fill my thoughts with God’s Word.  

• First of all, I journal; I actually journal a lot!  I write which scriptures, phrases and ideas jump out to me as I have my quiet time.  I jot down questions or fresh insights from the Holy Spirit.  I often look up passages in various translations and write down the differences I notice.  I make a point to identify each day how the scripture passage I read applies to the events and responsibilities on my schedule.  My journaling is my response to how God’s Word is speaking to my heart and my need.  
• Secondly I write verses on 3x5 cards that I recognize I need to remember for the day or for a circumstance I am facing.  I often carry the verse in my pocket as a reminder, or I set it up wherever I am working: by my computer, propped up in the kitchen, or used as a bookmark while I read. 
• Third, I write out my prayers.  Some people may consider it journaling, but I’m actually writing out the very words my heart is speaking to God.  I write out my requests, and concerns. I list the names of people I know with needs. I pour out my struggles and beg for wisdom. And I write what my heart hears God saying and my response back. This helps me stay focused as I talk with the Lord. 
• Lastly I set reminders on my phone to stop what I’m doing and check in with Jesus throughout the day.   I check a brief devotional on an app, or I take a moment to breathe out a prayer and allow the Holy Spirit to speak into my immediate circumstance. I’m setting myself up to connect with Christ continually because I am His disciple.

Discipline looks different on different people because God created each of us to be unique disciples.  He calls us to look at Him (not everyone else!) and follow.  We begin by filling our thoughts with His Word; rest in the assurance that they will bring true life.   

Grace Given

 

On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 represents not-at-all and 10 represents totally, how much are you like Moses?  I know, it seems like an odd question.  Realistically, it’s also a very broad question.  Perhaps you answered 8 because your parents took you boating a lot when you were small.  Maybe you answered 1 because you’ve never met an Egyptian, let alone killed one.  You could’ve answered 9 if you spend a lot of time in the desert.  Or it may be you chose 5, going straight down the middle, because you like to lead but you are only in charge of a small group. What if I asked: on a scale of 1 to 10, were 1 represents not-at-all and 10 represents totally, how quick are you to tell God “don’t pick me, pick someone else?” That’s when I feel most like Moses.

I find myself acting like Moses more than I care to admit.  I remember the year we were buried in snow and still it kept falling.  I would be out shoveling and often felt God nudging me to shovel my neighbor’s sidewalk.  I confess I was quick to tell God I had already been outside too long, it was cold and I was so sore.  When I receive emails to take a meal to a church family in need, I find myself giving God excuses like, I’m not a good cook or, it’s such a busy week. At times I sense God prompting me to call someone and check to see how she is doing.  I imagine God might roll His eyes at me as I ramble out excuses. I suspect He wonders when I’ll willingly say yes the moment He calls on me.  My guess is you have your own list of experiences when you have given God a list of Moses-like excuses. 

God recently asked me to step out in obedience.  I followed.  And I struggled.  I ran through a gamut of emotions: determined, unsure, frustrated, anger, and feeling used.  I tried to do what God asked of me, but in my mind I wondered why I hadn’t given God a Moses-excuse and told Him to send someone else. God graciously met me in the middle of my conflict.  The Holy Spirit spoke to me through Ephesians 3:8.  “This grace was given to me — the least of all the saints – to proclaim to the Gentiles the incalculable riches of Christ.” (CSB)

God gently pointed out to my soul that Paul was asked to do something far beyond His comfort zone.  He was a Jew’s Jew and he was asked to spread the gospel to the Gentiles of all people!  The Holy Spirit also pointed out to me that Paul didn’t necessarily feel as if he was the best choice for this task since he described himself as “the least of all the saints.”  God was hitting my buttons, dealing straight with the issues I was whining about in my head. 

The phrase that captivated me was the beginning of the verse: “This grace was given…” Grace.  “The freely given, unmerited favor and love of God.”[i] Paul was gifted the favor of God.  He didn’t deserve it; he most definitely needed it.  That’s the thing with grace.  God knows I don’t always feel up for what He asks of me, He knows my fears and limitations.  And still He gives grace; He gives me His favor and His love.  His grace enables me, even if I feel to be least of all the options.  His grace covers my fumbling and stumbling as I work outside my safe-zone.  His grace strengthens me as I face the enemy so that His work will be accomplished. 

What is God asking of you?  Have you been giving Him Moses-like excuses like I tend to do?  Are you feeling as if you are totally unqualified, that there is surely someone better equipped?  Are you afraid it’s too far removed from comfort zone? Are you afraid God’s calling is just too big to manage?  Paul learned how great God’s grace is and he passed on some encouragement to his disciple Timothy that is good for our ears to hear as well.  “He has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began.” (2 Timothy 1:9, CSB) Grace has been given.  It’s time we obediently said “yes.”

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[i] Dictionary.com. Version 7.5.41. Copyright 2015-present, Parse, LLC. All rights reserved

Surprise!

I have a precious friend who has a tendency to surprise me.  I never know when she might magically appear with a special treasure.  I am periodically caught off guard by a funny text, a silly gif or a photo with a snarky comment.  She is one of those people who delights in delighting others.  I've been gifted cupcakes, surprise drives for coffee, and minion paraphernalia.  Whenever she appears on my front porch she is decked out in smiles and giggles.  Her life is by no means simple or easy.  She deals with hard things Every. Single. Day.  And she continues to view life as a prize that holds hidden riches waiting to be discovered.  I love that about her. 

 

I like surprises.  I love it when my husband comes home from work with a bouquet of flowers.  I love it when my daughter texts me a funny meme that made her think of me.  I love crossing paths with random friends that I haven't seen in a while when I'm running errands.  I love it when my son shows up with food from his favorite Mexican restaurant and shares their amazing guacamole with me.

 

Have you ever experienced an "A-ha!" moment when reading a really familiar Bible Story? Have you ever read a passage of scripture and thought, "How have I not noticed that before?"  Can you recall a moment when God showed up and you realized He sees you and knows exactly what you are feeling in the middle of the circumstance you are living? It bowls me over every time God surprises me in such a way.

 

I recently read the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand. I admit, when I began reading the passage in Matthew 14, I didn't realize that was the story I was getting into.  I suspect I normally read the story from the book of John (chapter 6:1-15).  There seem to be more details that help one see a picture of the crowd, the disciples, and the boy with his lunch in the gospel of John.  The story in Matthew begins with verse 13, "When Jesus heard about it, he withdrew from there by boat to a remote place to be alone. When the crowds heard this, they followed him on foot from the towns." (CSB) I glanced at the preceding verses and realized Jesus had just heard about the beheading of John the Baptist.   We've all been  there.  We've all had that moment when we are hurting and we just want to be alone.  The idea of dealing with others is just too hard; our emotions are still so raw. We aren't ready to express what our soul is wrestling with to others or add their feelings and opinions into our grief.  Jesus was faced with one of those moments when he didn't seem able to escape. 

 

I want to believe there were some in the crowd who wanted to show Jesus their support as he grieved.  I hope there was those who wanted to make sure he was okay.  I'm sure there were those who wanted to see his suffering.  They weren't Jesus fans, and they perhaps got some weird pleasure out of the possibility of seeing his hurt.  And I'm convinced there were many who were completely unaware; they just wanted what they wanted.  They were more interested in Jesus as a miracle worker to fix their situation than they were in Jesus the man, Jesus the prophet, or Jesus the Son of God.  I suppose it doesn't make too much difference about the composition of the crowd.  The truth is there was a crowd of people invading Jesus' space just when he wanted to be alone.  That resonated with me.  I recognize that feeling all too well. 

 

Matthew 14:14 says that when Jesus saw the crowd, he "had compassion on them, and healed their sick."  (CSB) One would think I wouldn't be surprised by this action of Jesus, and yet I was.  It was hard for me to get beyond how he must have been hurting over the loss of John.  John the Baptist was his cousin, his friend, his co-worker in the Kingdom. Plus John was his loyal servant, the one who came before Him to announce His arrival, the one who baptized Him even though he claimed to be unfit to tie Jesus' sandals.  Jesus, son of God, God himself incarnate, was grieving over the treatment of his beloved child.  In the middle of his anguish, he was faced with a crowd of hurting people asking him to step up to the plate and do something for each of them. 

 

As the wife of a pastor, I've had those moments in time when I've had to set aside my feelings, my exhaustion, my plans and adapt to what is needed by another in that moment. I get the idea that we are to serve and be available to what God asks of us.  And I admit I've done necessary tasks with as much kindness as I have humanly been able to muster, but I've served with reservation.  I too often have had the clock ticking in the back of my mind and I've been ready to step away as soon as the moment presents itself.  I don't want to tell you the truth that I enter those situations with a mixture of wanting to serve and express Christ's love while I'm also looking for a way to get back to tending to the wounds in my own spirit. 

 

God surprised me with Jesus' willingness to so completely set Himself aside.  Jesus didn't say, "Thanks for coming. I need a little time alone, so can we meet up later?"  Jesus didn't kindly, but firmly turn them all away.   Jesus didn't sit around and commiserate with them over how life was hard, allowing them to share their hurt while looking for an opportunity to share his hurt with them. Jesus didn't let his personal hurt stop him from meeting them in the middle of their hurt. Jesus had compassion on them.  I know He had complete and utter compassion because he acted on that compassion by healing their sick.  And then, after being with them all day, he sat them down and fed them.  Jesus went beyond what they initially asked for and gave them more.  Even though he himself was hurting and grieving. 

 

In the book Double Blessing, author Mark Batterson says, "Blessing is God's default setting -- His first and foremost reflex." Jesus fell back to His default setting; He had compassion and blessed the crowd. And He blessed me as well.  I generally am quick to identify a blessing as being spoiled, being surprised like my friend surprises me.  As I pondered over the story, I saw myself in the crowd.  My heart ached because I wanted to see myself in the person of Jesus.  But I didn't. I recognized how I too often am too concerned with me and not with the mission of Christ. In His wisdom, and with kindness and grace, God blessed me when He posed some tough questions to my heart: Do I trust Him enough to provide the time and space I think I need to be rejuvenated when I am hurting or feel depleted?  Do I believe God will bless me with what I truly need even if it looks differently than I anticipate?  Am I willing to allow God's Spirit to reschedule my time even if it means feeling stretched beyond what I believe I can handle?  Am I willing  to follow God's leading in complete obedience with a Christ-like attitude of compassion, kindness and servanthood? 

 

God asked Jesus to live out compassion on a tough day.  Philippians 2:4 and 5 says, "Everyone should look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.  Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus." (CSB)  God asks nothing different of me, or you.  And blessing is God's default setting.  If Jesus blessed the needy, hungering crowd in the midst of his heartache and grief, why would He not bless you or me as we live in obedience to His promptings?  He is a good Father, a good God.  Psalms 84:11 and 12 says "… he does not withhold the good from those who live with integrity.  Happy is the person who trusts in you, Lord of Armies!" (CSB) 

 

God wants to bless us.  God wants us to know how deeply He loves us.  God is desperate for us to grasp that He hurts when our lives are hard and that we can trust Him.  God wants us to anchor our lives on the truth that living out His mission, even when we are experiencing heartache, opens the door for us to have purpose and be blessed more than we can imagine.

 

God surprises are the best; they come wrapped in blessing. 

Seeking Jesus

I fell apart several days ago. I became completely overwhelmed and couldn't see how I was going to manage everything I thought needed to be done.  It came over me suddenly and, to be honest, it caught me off guard.  My guess is it caught my sweet husband off guard as well!  In the space of a couple of hours, doing something that took longer than expected, I lost rational perspective.  My husband (bless his heart) tried to be supportive and helpful.  I did my best to explain my fears.  He did his best to offer suggestions that could eliminate some of my stress.  I didn't feel as if he had heard me when I was rambling through my emotional explanation and in a split second I was beaten by my own anxiety, submerged in a mixture of confusion and disillusionment.  I said I couldn't take any more and I went to bed.  I can still feel him watching me as I walked away; his face etched with shock and bewilderment. 

A part of me wants to explain the whole scenario to you.  I want to convince you that my pain and frustration were understandable.  I want you to comment and affirm that my emotional upheaval was justifiable.  I want to be right in my wrong-ness. 

I wouldn't have always said that my behavior on that night was wrong; I can rationalize with the best of them.  God has been teaching me differently.  Feeling overwhelmed was not a moral issue; experiencing stress was not a sin.  And, also true, my behavior wasn't godly. 

Just the preceding week I had spent time In God's Word leaning how I was to rejoice while experiencing tough circumstances (Romans 5:3-8); set my hope on God and that God provides me with all things to enjoy (1 Tim 6:17-19); set my hope on grace and be holy because Jesus is holy (1 Peter 1:13-16); Draw near to God, hold onto hope, remember that God is faithful and we are to encourage one another (Hebrews 10:22-25).  Each passage strongly emphasized how I was to focus on God and do what is needed to get as close to Him as I can.  He provides all I need regardless of what is going on.  He alone has saved me from the worst possible circumstance ever: being separated from my Creator, The One who loves me most.  He is faithful, all-powerful, and the giver of all that is good.  I had spent time looking up the different ways grace is given to me in different forms, and the various characteristics of God's grace.  It is sufficient; it is enough.  God gives grace in abundance.  It helps me in my times of need.  God's grace trains me to renounce ungodliness, to be self-controlled, upright and godly.  Grace helps me wait for hope.  It strengthens me and brings me near to God. Grace has given me Jesus, who is my peace.  I stand in grace. That's so much grace that I don't just hold it like a bouquet of flowers. I stand in it as if I were standing out in a field of wildflowers by the acre.

God had given me, through His Word, what I needed to face my moment of stress in a godly manner.  He provided the truth of who He is and what He offers me so that I could choose to come to Him.  God was waiting for me that evening to stop in the midst of my tirade and talk to Him. He was standing by, eager for me to pour out all my concerns and worries and disappointments and stresses.  He was patiently lingering, hoping I'd remember what I'd been taught, and humble myself at His feet, offering Him the opportunity to show up for me in a powerful way.  I prayed, but I didn't seek Him.  I didn't even think about grace and how good God is to me.  I just wanted God to swoop in and fix things superman style and pronounce, "it's all good now!"

Colossians 3:1-4 reminds us that we are to seek things from above.  In fact the passage even says that I'm to "set my mind" on those same things. That requires me to choose to think about those things with a choice of my will, determination and commitment.  I'm to let my sinful self die; it's not to have any life whatsoever.  It doesn't get the opportunity to put forth it's opinion, to advocate for me to push for what I want.  It doesn't get a voice at all.  It is to be utterly extinguished.  Instead, I'm to find myself looking for Christ, focusing on Him and the new creation life He offers me. 

Seeking is not a one and done thing.  Seeking Jesus means I'm always looking for His grace, His wisdom, His strength, and His leading.   I seek Him when things are going well so that I stay on the path He's chosen for me.  And I stop whatever I'm doing when things begin to fall apart to pray with deep humility, seeking not an answer to my dilemma, but Christ Himself.  I missed that step the other night and I found myself being unable to handle the emotional weight of my own choices and behavior. 

God is faithful.  God is rich in mercy.  His grace saves me and brings me close to Him, reconciling me with the Father.  I am to seek Him.  Jennie Allen, in her book Get Out of Your Head, says, "When our thoughts are consumed with ourselves, we forget how very much we need Jesus." 

I'm not stressed today, nor overwhelmed.  I'm relaxed and thinking positively.  And I still am in desperate need of Jesus.  I am determining to seek Christ, choosing to set my mind on things that will please Him. And if at some point in my day I find myself at a junction, I'm coming back and reading this.  I want to be reminded of the lessons God teaches me, how He is calling me to be hidden in Him completely.  I'm setting my mind today to "feast on all the treasures of the heavenly realm and fill [my] thoughts with heavenly realities, and not with the distractions of the natural realm." (Colossians 3:2, The Passion Translation)  What's your mind set on?

Keep Rejoicing

I glanced at my June calendar the other morning and I was surprised.  It was basically filled with my work schedule and that's about it.  It didn't have the appearance of my typical June calendar.  There were no identifiers of fun evenings with friends, or lazy summer afternoon coffee with the girls.  There were no vacation markings or date night love notations.  It's Summer 2020.  And it's weird. 

Things are especially weird right now in our home. My husband had a meeting last week.  That's normal; he has many meetings.  One of the people he met with called him with the information that they had been in extensive contact with someone over the preceding weekend who  was now diagnosed with Covid-19.  Until we find out if the person he met with is infected, he's living in the trailer so that there is no risk to  me.  It's not awful. It's not fun.  It's strange and awkward.  He has food in the trailer for breakfast, lunch and snacks. I still make dinner and place it either on the deck table or on the freezer in the garage.  We face time while we dine. He doesn't have any symptoms so he's still doing his job, just from the trailer.  I go to work as I am scheduled and do the same things I normally do from home.  And it's bizarre and slightly unsettling.  It's not what we would ever choose.

I thought about our circumstance when I recently read Romans 5:1-6.  Verse 3 says, ". . .we also rejoice in our afflictions. . ."  I wouldn't say I am afflicted, that sounds so serious and terrible.   I admit I tend to interpret this verse as I am supposed to be happy about whatever stinks in my life.  Rejoice after all means to be glad, to take delight, to make joyful, according to the dictionary. When I hear the word rejoice I associate it with celebrating, enjoying one's self, enjoying others, having a party, laughing, singing, dancing, kicking up one's heels and reveling in the  moment.  I don't feel that way about our present living arrangement. 

Thankfully Paul doesn't make the statement about rejoicing in Romans 5 and leave it standing alone unexplained.   Paul, in typical Paul fashion, uses many words to drive home his idea.  Paul continues his thought through verses 4 and 5, with reasons for rejoicing. 

• Going through afflictions produces endurance.  Endurance is that ability to keep going, to keep pressing forward.  That raises the question in my mind "What am I to be moving forward toward?"  Paul gives the answer to that in verses 1 and 2, before he instructs us to rejoice in stuff that isn't what we would choose.  Verses 1 and 2 remind us that we have been declared righteous because Jesus offered himself as a perfect sacrifice; Jesus was the penalty payment for our sins when he died on the cross.  We now have peace with God and the opportunity to have deep intimacy with the Almighty One who created us.  We stand in grace that not only offers us forgiveness, but also offers us entry into eternal life with the Father.  We get to have deep intimacy with God for the rest of all time. That's something to celebrate!  We are moving forward toward experiencing God face to face for eternity.  We are pressing toward the life God had planned for man when He created Eden.  We are enduring through afflictions so that we can live the life we were all meant to live.
• As we continue to endure, our character is proven.  We are becoming more anchored in Christ through this process of rejoicing in the fact that we are declared righteous, that we stand in grace, and that we are continually moving toward heaven, even when the circumstances of life are less than favorable.  As we commit to celebrating over our salvation even when life is tough, the Spirit produces evidence of His work in our individual lives.  Galatians 5:22 says, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…" Those characteristics, as they appear consistently in our lives, are proof to us and to others, that we have pledged ourselves devoted to Jesus who gave His life for us.  We see Him as someone to always get excited over, to be glad about, to express joy  in respect to what He as done.
• As our character becomes more and more formed into the image of Christ, our hope becomes stronger and deeper.  I have realized the more my life is filled with Jesus, the deeper is my desire to be with Him.  I want to experience His presence, His pleasure and His affirmation.  I want to spend time with Him each morning. I set aside time to know Him more intimately and I work to pattern my life after all He says is significant.  I long for our relationship to be more rooted and pervasive; I anticipate the day when I will be held in complete awe over the extent of His fully revealed glory. The hope of the someday of eternity becomes more real and more wildly exciting the more my life is intertwined with my Savior, Jesus Christ.  Paul affirms this idea when he says in verse 5 "This hope will not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us."  God's Holy Spirit is already giving each of us a taste of this grand hope by allowing us to savor the love He is generously pouring into us.  

Does it still feel complicated?  Overwhelming?  Are you still thinking "I'm supposed to be happy over what?"  Let me try to simplify.  We are to rejoice over who Jesus is and what He has done for us, while we are experiencing circumstances that we would never choose, because it draws us into greater intimacy with the One who created us and loves us most.  When we are afflicted and still rejoice, we learn how to lean on His strength instead of trying to muscle through on our own.  We grasp deeper understanding of truths like God's ways and thoughts are higher than ours (Isaiah 55:9) and God's presence is my good (Psalms 73:28). We encounter the Holy Spirit and open the door for Him to shape us.  We take steps of obedience that create evidences, to ourselves and to others, that we are different from the world because we belong to a different Kingdom.  We gain the practice of focusing more on what Christ says is important, not what this earth says is significant.

Jesus didn't die for us so that we would be saved and then beat down by the circumstances of this earthly life.  Jesus' love for each of us extends so far beyond salvation.  John 10:10 says that Christ came to provide abundant life.  I recently read this quote: "Let every opportunity that comes to you this day be the open doorway into [God's] presence."  (from Whispers, June 29, Brian Simmons and Gretchen Rodriquez)  This statement makes me wonder if I become too focused on my circumstance do I then become unaware of His love being poured into me moment by moment by moment?

Can I ask you three questions?  They are the questions I asked myself as I was reading Romans 5:1-6.  They enabled me to step back from what was going on in my life and make space for God.  1.) What are your current afflictions? List out those things that are hard; make you frustrated; leave you wiped out; cause you to  feel alone or sad.   2.) How do you imagine your afflictions look from God's point of view?  Consider how He might want to use them for your good, to make you more like Christ. Remember or search out scripture passages that speak to how God sees you.  3.) What step of obedience is God asking of you so that you can keep pressing forward toward hope.  Sit in God's presence, quiet your heart and your mind, wait patiently and listen actively for the Holy Spirit to speak. 

God's love is pouring into your heart at this very moment.  He is faithful.  He is with you.  He is offering grace.  He wants to hear you rejoicing.  He wants you to hope.

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Do you like introspection?  I know several people who seem to like it, or perhaps it's just that they like the outcome well enough that they appear to jump into introspection without hesitation.  I, on the other hand, avoid introspection much like some people are avoiding the Corona Virus. I will do just about anything, cleaning bathrooms included, to not look deep within myself and answer difficult questions.  I know it's a fear problem.  I'm afraid I'll find out something about myself that screams failure.  I'm afraid that once that label of failure is pulled out and stuck on some portion of who I am, it will multiply and cover my entire person.  Add to my fear the fact that delving deep into one's inner self is hard work, and this fun-loving girl is off to find some ice cream and a good book.

The idea of fun has been a somewhat invisible concept in our world lately.  There is hurt and pain and dissonance.  There is protesting and anger and argument.  There are derailed plans, loss of jobs, and strange illnesses.  There is fear and isolation and disappointment and depression.  Many of us feel lonely, misunderstood, abused, judged, trapped, bored and cheated out of what should have been.  I can see several of these in my own life and it doesn't take any serious introspection to unveil the sadness.  With all that is currently attacking our culture, social media is flooded with the idea of evaluating one's inner processing.  I remind you: I don't like introspection. Perhaps you are like me.  I want an easy answer;  I want a quick fix to hard circumstances. I want a simple to do list to correct my skewed perceptions.  I want to be able to just do what is necessary to rebuild my brokenness and move on.  I want to rip off the band-aids that I've used to cover up my issues and then push quickly beyond, forgetting my issues were ever even there. 

I don't think that's going to happen.  Nor do I think that's healthy or wise.

I week or so ago I read the first chapter in the book of James.  It's the chapter where James talks about being a doer, not just a hearer.  I was thumbing back through my journal and came across some notes I had jotted down.  God's Holy Spirit drew me toward what I had written and the questions I had wondered. He challenged my soul to look more deeply into what He was saying in His Word. 

James begins his letter talking about the benefits of tough times (verses 2-18).  James clearly states that we are to lean into God for wisdom when we go through circumstances that are demanding or grievous or oppressive or even just puzzling. James goes on to say that we need to be steadfast in continually seeking to see life from God's perspective.  We need to be aligning what we believe to be important with what God says is important, because every truly good and perfect gift is something God provides.

James most have known shifting one's perspective is especially difficult, because he gives practical tips to help us with our about-face.  He tells us to listen well, wait to speak, and keep our anger in check (verse 19).  He also graciously informs his readers that following his three simple tips will be easier if we clean our life of "moral filth" and "prevalent evil" (verse 21).  We are to be investing our time and energy in actively learning about and obeying God's Word, His precepts and His commands.  James sums up this concept succinctly by stating: "be doers of the word and not hearers only…" (verse 22).

Then James provides the supposedly clarifying image of someone who looks in a mirror, but forgets what he looks like (verses 23 and 24). I've always thought it was a weird concept.  How does one forget what one looks like?  In my quirky imagination, I see a person viewing her reflection and then as she walks away, her face slowly fades until there are no features visible to describe. It could make for a really freaky movie. James states that if you are not a doer, just a hearer, you are deceiving yourself.  This deception is like looking in the mirror and then forgetting what you look like.  James 1:24 in the CSB versions says, "For he looks at himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of person he was."  That is interesting phrasing to me.  I have always thought of this person as forgetting what he looked like, not forgetting what kind of person he was.  I can see the connection to deceiving oneself with this idea.  I'm sure I often remain blissfully unaware of what I really look like, because I look once in the mirror in the morning, give my appearance a mental thumbs up, and assume everything will look exactly the same later…  not taking into account the wind, the rain, some perspiration, and so on. By the end of the day I could easily be living in the perception that I'm looking good, when I may look as if I just survived a tornado!  

You may be wondering, how does that image connect with being a doer of the word, not just a hearer?  I took some time and studied some of the individual words.  First of all, the word for look means more than just glancing at ones self.  It means to observe fully, consider, even to the point of discovering something about ones' self.  The words for "own face" can be translated "his natural face."  The word for natural is the word genesis meaning one's natural self or one's nature.  When I consider these definitions I come to this conclusion:  when you look into the Word and just listen to it, it's like taking the time to do some serious introspection, discovering what you are really like, with all your flaws and misperceptions and sins that you try to cover up, but you are unwilling to change anything.  It's like looking in a mirror and noticing you've got dirt all over your face.  You might say something like, "Oh! Look! There's that dirt!" but you don't clean it up, and once you've walked away you forget about the dirt and figure you're looking fine.

James is talking to believers, people who claim to be changed by the truth of who Jesus is and what He did on the cross.  As believers, we are followers of Christ and want to live life the way that He lived life.  We know we are sinners and that we are always in desperate need of God's grace.  James is challenging us to not get stuck and says things like, "that's just how I am!"  James wants us to lean into God for His wisdom, and then take His wisdom so seriously that we follow through with action. James wants us to take the time for introspection, recognizing our individual struggle points, and then doing the work to align our beliefs and behaviors so that they match God's wisdom. Introspection is more easily accomplished when I am quick to listen to the Holy Spirit, slow to retaliate or rationalize, and slow to be defensive  or angry about what is revealed. As James 1:23 says, we are to "humbly receive the implanted word, which is able to save [our] souls."

If I'm  honest, the Holy Spirit's revelation made me a bit nervous.  I knew he was leading me to the dreaded introspection.  He has been reminding me that God loves me, period.  I don't need to be afraid.  I've come to the conclusion that to be a doer is not just about stepping forward into action, or checking things off a holy to-do list.  I am to saturate myself in the person of Jesus Christ.  I am to be continually seeking His wisdom and His perspective on all elements of my life.  I need to do the inner delving and know myself clearly from God's point of view.  I need to do the necessary changes to align my beliefs, perceptions, attitudes and behaviors so that they match God's righteousness.   It sounds a bit scary.  And James 1:25 reassures me that it's how I discover freedom, and it's how I become blessed.  It's time to take a look in the mirror.