Dreams, Hopes and Expectations

All of us, since childhood, have had dreams.  Some my dreams were wild and excessively imaginative: it’s not often that a girl from a pastoral family in Kansas gets to be Queen.  Some of my dreams were typical: like that “one boy” would actually decide he thinks I am cute.  Some of my dreams were true possibilities of what I might actually be when I grew up.  Some of my dreams are still dreams; they have yet to come true. 

The human mind and spirit is fascinating in determining which dreams to hold on to, to hope they will come true, and to begin to expect that the imaginable become reality.  The Bible story of Joshua is intriguing in that regard.  For years, Joshua was Moses assistant.  He went where Moses went; he did what Moses told him to do.  Joshua played 2^nd fiddle for a very long time.  Did he ever hope to lead?  Did he ever expect that he would actually take Moses place and lead the children of Israel?  Or did Joshua just want to learn from the godly man that he was assisting?  There’s no way to know actually what Joshua dreamed of or hoped for.  Perhaps someday, when we are all sitting around the pearly gates after a delicious meal of tacos on a Tuesday, we can ask.

When I read the story of Joshua, I do realize one big lesson about hopes and expectations: one always has to live on God’s timetable.  Joshua was a warrior.  He wasn’t created to be just another mini-Moses.  Joshua had skills and gifts that were different than Moses.  Yet, for a long time, Joshua’s purpose was to assist, to learn and to be available.  God’s timetable for Joshua was not quick, just like when you look at the story of Moses.  Moses spent years in the desert before he was ready, and the timing was right for the children of Israel to be freed.  So Joshua had to wait for his hopes and expectations to be used of God to be fulfilled.

It’s a new year.  I can’t count how many times and from how many sources I have heard the phrase, “New Year, New You!”  It’s a catchy phrase and it is motivating and filled with hope.  As I look toward this New Year, I want more than just a “new me.”  I want to be like Joshua and fulfill the purpose that God has decreed for me.  I may not yet know what that purpose is, or how it will be lived out, but the words God gave to Joshua in the first chapter of his story give me some direction.

First, I need to remember that God is with me.  He will not fail me, or abandon me.  God promises that to Joshua in Joshua 1:5.  Before God gives any instruction, God wants to ease any of Joshua’s fears.  God wants to do the same for me.  Jesus came as Emmanuel, God with us.  I can choose to trust that God will not leave me to flounder on my own.

Secondly, I need to choose to be strong and courageous (Joshua 1: 6, 7 & 9).  I have to admit those words are much easier to say or to read than to actually live out. They shouldn’t be.  I need to keep going back to the first thing: God is with me.  And then I need to remember and focus on who God really is.  He is the God who created the entire world from literally nothing.  He is the God who parted the Red Sea.  He is the God who stopped the sun from setting.  He is the God who rescued one of his servants from some very hungry lions.  He is the God who helped a young shepherd boy slay a really big warrior giant with a rock. He is the God who died, and rose again, defeating the power of death.  He is THAT God and He is with me.  Why shouldn’t I choose to believe that I can be strong and courageous?

Thirdly, I am to obey (Joshua 1:7).  God tells Joshua that he is to obey all the instructions.  He is not to deviate at all.  To make sure he knows what to do, God tells Joshua in verse 8 to study the book of instructions that Moses had left and to study continually.  That’s some serious cramming.  God promises that if Joshua obeys, he will be successful.  I am to be no different than Joshua.  I am to study God’s Word, meditate on it, let God’s words become the filter I use to determine what I do, how I think, the way I respond, and the attitude I project.  

Joshua’s initial interpreter of God was Moses.  I have been given the Holy Spirit, who lives within me and is my counsel and guide.  It makes me a bit sad for Joshua.  And if I have a better interpreter of God than Joshua, why shouldn’t I hope and expect to accomplish even more than him?  God promises Joshua that he will be successful in what God had already determined for him to do.  I too will be successful when I choose to be strong and courageously obey what God teaches me, always remembering that He is with me, helping me, guiding me and enabling me.

“This is my command – be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 NLT  

Music to my Soul

I go through phases when I struggle with my worth.  It's my "Achilles heel" so to speak.  I have seasons when I move forward in great confidence and self-assurance.  My faith is strong, I'm willing to take risks, I believe in who God made me to be and the unique gifts He equipped me with.  And then I have seasons when I crumble on the inside.  I become fearful, doubting myself, doubting God's ability to use me, wondering why I am wired the way I am.

When I was younger, I would've told you that the strong seasons and the fearful seasons coincided with how much I'd been investing into my relationship with Jesus.  Generally, the fearful seasons aligned themselves with an inconsistency in time spent in God's Word, and not opening myself to conversation with the Holy Spirit in prayer. 

I have learned that particular lesson and have matured to daily time with Jesus, every day, week in and week out.  I read his Word; I love to learn at His feet. God strengthened and stretched me by encouraging a friend to challenge  me to read a book on prayer. I began to pray scripture over myself and those I bring to God's throne.  Journaling those prayers has helped me tremendously in being consistent in conversing with Christ. 

Yet a season of fear and doubt overwhelmed me.  God has been faithful to speak peace and hope to my heart.  My emotions have still trapped me on a roller-coaster ride that has taken my breath away on some days. 

Today, as I went through the process of getting ready for the day, I was listening to music. Song after song after song whispered strength and hope to my weary soul. I recognized my need and God's generous grace in the words that spoke directly to struggle.  My heart resonates with Isaiah 9:2 "The people who walk in darkness will see a great light.  For those who live in a land of deep darkness, a light will shine."  Emmanuel, God with us, has come.  He sings over me.