Fresh A-has!

Have you noticed that our culture is currently caught between two extremes of reaching out to help others in need, and selfishly stockpiling items in fear of not having enough.  The two extremes can even easily come from the very same person, who doesn't recognize the discrepancy.  How do I know?  God has been clearly pointing out to me my own regular, daily, selfish behavior.  I haven't been stockpiling, and I have still bought more than I need of some things (don't begrudge me my sweet and salty popcorn). This morning God spoke as I read the story of Jesus feeding the five thousand. The Holy Spirit presented some fresh "A-has!" and then He nudged my spirit to seek forgiveness and pray for more committed obedience. 

A-ha #1:  I am like the disciples.  Jesus tells the disciples in Matthew 14:16 "They don't need to go away.  You give them something to eat."  There is a LARGE crowd.  It's late in the day, and it's most definitely dinner time.  The disciples think Jesus should dismiss the crowd so that they can go find something to eat.  I totally get their plan.  After all, the disciples recognized the crowd  was hungry and they came up with a workable idea.  They aren't asking them to sit through another story, or just hang on a bit longer. I think the disciples were being practical and pro-active, especially since being in charge of handling big problems is way out of my wheelhouse.  I would've been happy to give the hungry crowd some encouragement, suggest dining options, or even suggest quick easy meals to make once they got home.  I can be full of random information like that.  As you read on in the story, the disciples give excuses to Jesus after his declaration.  I would've offered excuses, I understand completely the arguments the disciples present to Jesus and I've often thought they were valid!  And Jesus doesn't budge from His original idea: the people don't need to go away, the disciples need to feed them.   The Holy Spirit nudged me to begin to consider what Jesus has asked of me and I've worked to wiggle out of it with "valid excuses."  For example:  I'm not to just come up with great ideas to help other people during our current culture of isolation; I'm to be involved.  When someone I know needs a helping hand, I need to stop spouting excuses and listen to what Jesus is asking me to do. 

A-ha #2:  Jesus didn't ask the disciples to do everything on their own.  Jesus didn't go through a step by step process with them of how to do a miracle.  He didn't ask, did you pray for more food?  What's in your pockets?  What resources are available to you?   That final question is the big one: what are your resources?  Sure, the disciples found some bread and fish, small resources to be sure.  Their main resource was Jesus.  Jesus wasn't expecting them to do it all on their own.  I wonder if in his mind Jesus was thinking: "Hello?!  Dudes!  Did you forget again who I am?  Have you still not grasped that I've got this miracle thing in the bag?  Nothing is impossible for me!"  I know I've forgotten that truth in the past.  I see my limited resources and I think, "God don't ask me!.  I don't have enough for such a big task!"  I don't consider God's ability to do the impossible as my number one resource.  Jesus never asks me to do anything on my own.  He's standing there waiting, patiently, for me to bring what I have and say, "okay, what do WE do next Jesus?" 

A-ha #3: I need to remember the leftovers.  In the story it says that "everyone ate and was satisfied," (verse 20) and then the disciples went around and picked up a bunch of leftovers.  I've always wondered what they did with those 12 baskets of leftovers?  Was that their lunch for the next several days?  Did they pass them out to large families?  Did they provide lunch for a new crowd the next day?  The Holy Spirit spoke to my spirit: there are always leftovers.  As I thought about that concept I realized when I teach a class, I offer God my time and energy to study and prepare.  Then I teach the class, or distribute, what God has provided.  The class participates and I glean new insight, leftovers.  Plus there is the information I learned in studying that I never teach, more leftovers.  When I help a friend, I bring God my willingness and skill set.  He provides the time needed to help, extra resources and energy.  I walk away with the leftovers of feeling purposeful, satisfied and grateful to be chosen and used.

I don't have to feed a big crowd today.  I don't even have to feed a small crowd!  And I need to be willing to do whatever Jesus declares.  He's not backing down in providing for those in my corner of the world; it's who He is.  He is the provider.  He is the one who relentlessly pursues.  He is the one who is seeking the lost and asking me to be part of His team of reconciliation. I need to stop giving excuses, rest in the truth that Jesus is my best resource, and then I need to look for the leftovers that God will provide.